Whether We Realized It or Not

A few days ago, I’m going with my friend to visit his ill mom.

I’ve just prepared to meet someone in a bed, with a lot of tubes and wires attached to her body. I’ve just prepared things to ask, words to say, and prayer to pray. I’ve prepared myself. Well, at least that’s what I think.

It turns out that I’m not prepared enough at all. We arrive on a house where people “a little different than us” live. I thought these people are just another inhabitant, and his mother is taken care somewhere in this house. Then a woman came and greet me. We are looking for my mother, my friend said. Alright, just sit down, and I will call her down, she said, and then left us. We sit, and see people passing by near us. Mostly womens. One standing near me and staring with empty looks. One sit at the chair faraway, and also staring at me. Another one besides her busy with her activity. And another one coming, try to shaking my hand. I replied her handshake. This is my mom, my friend suddenly said. I have to admit, I’m a little shocked. She’s white, she’s pretty, she’s smiling, and she’s.. empty. I rarely deal with a “different” person before, and I don’t really know what to say. My friend hold her hand, while the housekeeper offered us some mineral water to drink. “Mom, this is me.” My friend’s gentle voice suddenly touched me. She’s not reacting. Still smiling and looking at the television. “Mom, how do you do?” He asked again. I decided to help. “How’s your condition? Is it better today?” I’m surprised that my voice was a little shaken, and my throat suddenly felt dry, but I hoped no one noticed. After a few questions, we decided it’s time to go, and we pray for her illness. By her illness, I mean, her REAL illness. She got a tumor, and she’s going to be operated in the next few days. While we pray, I noticed that she’s also praying. After then, we’re going home.

In the way home, I thinking about it over and over again. About how my friend can be so gentle to handle her mom, after all these years. And it’s a long time, I assure you. I just thinking, will I be able to handle my mom as gentle as that if I’m in his shoes? All these things just tell me that I still have a long way to be a humble and strong person, and to giving thanks to what I have right now. Sometimes, we’re too taken for granted things we have in life. If we’re upset that we live in a normal family where our parents keep discipline us when we are doing something wrong, just think that there’s many people in the outside that longing for those same parents that still have time to discipline their children because they’re not occupied with divorce process. If we protest why we have this ugly job which we’ve to work very hard, how about if we’re on a position where we don’t know whether our family still have something to eat tomorrow?

One of my friend said that his psychologist friend once told him to enjoy things that he have now. Too many times we’re too concerned with what things we’re looking after, and neglected what we have today. Human always have this tendency, to disregard what they have now, and pursue it after they lose it. Choose our “prize” wisely, because our path lead to what prize we choose, whether we realize it or not.

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